Kinect Disneyland Adventures
Release: Late 2011
Platforms: Xbox 360
Preview date: July 20, 2011
Kinect Disneyland Adventures Preview
I donít like the Kinect. I never have. My disdain for the Kinect stems from the fact that the Wii did it first, and did it cheaper. What ĎItí is, is motion control, and when the Wii was released in 2006, it broke the glass ceiling, so to speak, with its innovativeness. Nothing like it had been done before; not on this scale anyway. Over the coming years, the Wii flourished and as of March 2011, the Wii had sold more worldwide units than PS3 and Xbox 360. So, as anyone who might dabble in marketing can see, there is considerable potential for sales. This is where Microsoft comes in, removes the controllers, and adds a hefty price tag, et voila! The Kinect was born. Please donít tell me Iím the only one who sees the similarities between the two? Even the cute little avatars look similar!
So it has no controllers? Whoopdee doo! I dislike the Kinect for the following reason. It would not have been released if it wasnít for the success of the Wii. Wii hardware was outselling Xbox hardware by over 100 million units, it was estimated in 2008, but no. The fact that work on the Kinect started just after this is, obviously, a coincidence. It leaves a sour taste in my mouth. They have disguised a piece of hardware; one that isnít that innovative, as a technological advance so significant, it got more TV air time than the Large Hadron Collider. The LHC could have revealed the secret to all life on earth by uncovering the Higgs-Boson particle, for goodness sake! I mean it didnít, it just broke, but hopefully, you see my point.
That being said, one game caught my eye. The one in the title funnily enough! When I first saw this, I was intrigued, donít get me wrong, but one thought entered my mind, and I may have said it before, but Iím going to say it again Ė
ďThis piece of software is redundant and will continue to be redundant until technology advances to the point that allows the use of Space Mountain in your front room.Ē Tom Lowe, 19th July 2011, 00:21 am.
My point is, the game claims to bring the theme park to your front room; but I can guarantee that it will be nothing like the theme park in question. The rides are the reason most of the people go, so to remove them from the experience is nonsensical to me. But still, letís be diplomatic about this and have a look.
As far as graphics are concerned, these look pretty good. You know, as realistic as a giant mouse in red shorts can be. Seriously, the landscapes are almost picture perfect; especially the ones in the park and everything else has a slightly cell-shaded charm to it. This looks like a ĎDisneyí animation. The sort of high quality production values that you would expect from a huge multinational conglomerate teaming with another huge multinational conglomerate.
So it looks flashy, and sounds flashy. The soundtrack is classic Disney, and subsequently is full of fluttery, floaty, wavy sounds. I imagine this is the kind of sound you would hear if you kept your extremely large and varied collection of flutes in an active wind tunnel. Although, I have never heard of someone owning those two things.
Gameplay looks to be Ďvintageí Kinect. Be it flying with Peter Pan and adding to Disneyís already large carbon footprint, or hugging Snow White, the on screen characters correspond to the movements of the player. Although, at this point Iím only thinking about whether Ariel from The Little Mermaid makes an appearance; Iíd give her more than a hug! Eh? *Nudges* Eh? No, Iím sorry. Phoning the authorities wonít be necessary. Slightly creepy thoughts aside, itís hard to fathom whether this will have a single player story mode, with a narrative and missions or just a party game romp in a Mario Party style. Iíd prefer the party game option, because if they go with the Story idea, it would be something hopeless like Ė
ďThe Disney Villains are joining forces to starve the world of Light, happiness, joy and Magic. Itís up to you, some children with an Xbox 360, to go into the park, travel through mystical, magical gateways in the parks rides, to the Disney Universe and vanquishing the evil threat in order to restore the real world to its former happiness!Ē, which is just terrible.
(Aside, how great would a GTA game be in Disneyland?! It looks open-world-ish from what Iíve seen. It will never happen... unless I somehow make it on a budget of £9.40.)
Donít get me wrong, I like the idea of this game, I do. It just seems all sizzle, no steak. Thereís nothing to it. In my opinion, itís just going to make kids want to go to Disneyland even more than they already do, but now they get an extra £40 off you and parents get a Disneyland advertisement beamed into their front room whenever their kids play the game. If the clip is to be believed, the parents are going to be right behind them whenever the game is being played, then hey presto. Next family vacation, the Cheesy Family (their smiles alone made me have a diabetic fit) is off to see Mickey Mouse! KDA is scheduled to be released in the latter part of 2011, around Christmas time.
What do you think? Do you agree? Do you disagree? Do you care?
Leave a comment. Or donít. Your choice.
Other Stuff That Might Be Important
During my research for this article, I saw that KDAís rating is Pending. Really? Although, to be honest, that bit where those kids are actively knocking the stuffing out of Captain Hook is pretty heavy. Itís not often I feel sorry for Disney villains, but I wanted to hug Captain Hook. This got me thinking though. Remember the Manhunt 2 debacle? Parents everywhere were up in arms about the fact that their children could be simulating the brutal murder of NPCís, and what followed was a simultaneous worldwide knee-jerk reaction so overblown that it caused a series of small earthquakes. Now, those parents are quite clearly idiots, but I bet KDA causes absolutely no controversy at all. Even though it could be argued that this game causes violence, in exactly the same way that Manhunt 2 causes violence. And whatís more, the parents are sat there with huge grins on their faces. Double Standards!
I have a Twitter account now. Not much happens and I just use it to follow wrestlers and comedians but follow me and I might say things occasionally. Itís @tlo1991. I think. I still donít get Twitter.
Finally, I have my University timetable. It seems I have a huge midweek gap, so expect posts from me on Wednesdays. I think I have made a similar promise in the past, but ignore that. WEDNESDAYS!